so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
