Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize