I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
