Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
