he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
