I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize