i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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