so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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