come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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