They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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