did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
