the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
