Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
