There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Everclear isn't food dammit
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
