you didnt know i had herpes?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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