There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
