Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
