if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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