I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Michael Bay diarrhea
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
