Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
