I cut my penus on the lid.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize