I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize