i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Randomize
