A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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