found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
