She said her name was "party"
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
