the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
