he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
