do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
