i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
