You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I have demons in me.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
