You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
