on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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