Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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