when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
