ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
