There was a lot of him and a little penis
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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