if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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