Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
