There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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