I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
