Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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