i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
