This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
we have officially lost it.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
