...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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