im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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