she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
