GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
