The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I didn't notice because vodka
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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