WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Randomize
