at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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